IVF and infertility

IVF and infertility

When my best friend had IVF fifteen years ago, I was sworn to secrecy. She was simply too embarrassed to have it ‘known’ that she had to go through IVF to have a baby. Of course, I sympathised because everyone wants the ‘dream’ holiday where you’re so happy, so in love you decide to try for a baby and come back pregnant.

But for many of us, it isn’t like that at all and I’m so glad to see IVF and treatments being more openly discussed so women no longer have to feel embarrassed to say they’ve been through them. Apart from anything, they emotionally rip you apart, so the more we can talk about it and be there for each other, the more likely we can survive such procedures.

And now my niece is going through it; a complication in her partner (and yes, it’s often not the woman who can’t conceive) means she is in the IVF cycle. And having been through a lot of it myself, I can not only tell her useful things but I can also make her hypnosis recordings to listen to (which she has been doing and she says she falls asleep every time before the end so has no idea what I’ve recorded!).

So, my one greatest pearl of wisdom, is this is BINARY. Whatever the experts say, the message boards, the date, papers, analysis, articles etc – it is simply a YES or a NO. You ARE pregnant or you are NOT. Everything else is details the experts can worry about! So, when they go on about egg and sperm quality, numbers, linings, flow, hormone levels and thousands of other things which will suddenly consume you, please remember this is ‘their’ stuff.

YOUR job is to stay calm, relaxed and positive. That’s it. Keep it simple!